decision

I quit my job. Hand in my month's notice as soon as I get back from slovenia. That way I work until the end of August. Aall my rent and bills will have been paid, and I can pocket all of my final paycheck, with, which what little i've managed to save, will give me at least 1,500 quid.

With that money I move to Glasgow and live there with Richard as long as I can afford it. I'd sell my car and have practically no expenses there, and should be able to stay for at least three months with no visa problems.

In the meantime, I'll try to freelance and keep looking for a job, doing some free work at a few papers down there, which should make it easier to ingratiate myself to potential employees. Fingers crossed, something will come up. Worse comes to worse, I have to go home, which was looking like an inevitibility anyway. At least this way I'll feel like I've done all I can, given it my best shot. And I won't continue to be miserable up here.

I was sticking around because it seemed safer; I can continue to try to save money while looking for jobs. But because of the expense of living alone, it's taking me ages to save anything, and I could be stuck doing so for god knows how long. By eliminating all the expenses, I'll actually be better off financially. It's still risky, but I think it's a risk I have to take.

I'm so relieved to have made a decision! And one I can happily live with. It made work a bit more bearable today as well. Only a bit. Because I was still made to do ridiculous tasks. And when I told the guys, they seemed really shocked, disappointed, and a bit hurt. Aww. It's my only regret, deserting them. But it's a minor one. It's going to be so awkward telling my editor as well. Ack. Ah well.

I've been making a list of freelance story ideas after realising how I should totally take advantage of all the contacts I've accumulated since being here. I could really cash in on my experience, especially since the two national Sunday newspapers tend to neglect this part of the world. I can offer them stories they have completely missed, stories that will appeal to a huge audience they often neglect. Once I started the list, it just kept growing at a fantastic speed; it's nearly a page long already. Nice. Even if I sell a handful of the ideas, it might just be enough to keep me going. And - this is a real push, I realise - in the ideal case I might even be able to get a visa if I can prove that there's enough income in it to support me for at least a year.

So that's that. Good eh?

Richard's quite happy with it too. A bit worried, but happy nonetheless. He's even started clearing some space in his room. And I've started packing. Now comes the difficult part... going through with it. And telling my mom. Eeps!